My dearest loving Agha Jan,
This is my final letter in this life to you. I am on that crossroad where I have to make a decision. I was never taken seriously when I told everyone in Australia and here that I have been abducted by two spirits or jins. One is subtle tapping movement in the body whereas the other one is strong like a collar around my neck. The stronger one keeps rotating and spinning my neck constantly all the time. My life is living hell. It is almost as if he is trying to take over my spirit and making me do things despite of my own desires anticipations. I think I have come to a stage in life where I have to fight for my soul. I cannot carry on further in this mode of life. This subtle and stronger phenomena I had also discovered in the book of Ibn Al Arabi. I must advise you, rest of my family members and friends to not look for answers about my life in the Islamic books. Who knows if I stay alive this could have severe repercussions for my family. What if I am eventually dead and he takes over me. I have to end it. I also think this will do good to Baba and rest of the family elders.
Death in life is one thing that everyone tries to avoid but it is inevitable. It is only a matter of how long we live. In my case I have to fight these spirits and had to live this life for a shorter span by giving it up for the sake of freedom in the next one. Now I will tell you where I went wrong. The first time I wrote you about becoming a Sufi, it was that night that spirits came and overtook my body. To these spirits I am only a cloak because I lost my right arm when I submitted to Sufism. This was a grave mistake. I greatly repent the conversion because I was unaware of what I am getting myself into. I thought that that information was for you only. Anyhow things turned out to be something else because they were playing me all along right from Australia. I am no Sufi. I have no regrets about life other than this that I have put you and our family in a difficult position in front of your friends and relatives. You see Agha everyone has to die eventually only in my case it is a little sooner. You must consider that there is happiness for me in the next life because I have suffered to much as it is. When I walked in to the library of Uni in Australia all the famous people on the shelves are dead. I stand God as my witness that if I was given another alternative I would have taken that path but this is beyond my control. If I get married to someone even then these spirits will still not go and that marriage will be theirs or his instead of mine. This is something I am not ready to reconcile with. Therefore I have to finish my body in this life because my judgment for the sanctity of spirits is different from Arabs. I am thankful to you and Mama for making me the man I am. I wish I could talk more to relieve you of the temporarily grief over my death but please I beg you not to worry because I am going to a world where I will greet your Grandfather. I have seen spirits around me and they are subtle as fog. One day, many years from now you too will come and join me. This life is only of few years and nothing more. I have tried to read books, which I like doing best, but these spirits are beyond measure of control and advise because they do not let me. It is embarrassing to be around people when I am not in control over my head and body movements and the pain is unbearable. You see I sought God and His creation more in the books than the world around me. In given peaceful circumstances graduating from ANU was a walk in the park. I pray to God that I get to assimilate more knowledge than anyone I have read or known. You must not also repent over alternatives such as maybe we would have sent him for studies again or had him married because that would not have been a workable solution. This universe is too big and this life is just momentary. My place is now in the heavens.
I am also taking with me all the great memories we have shared and they are so many that I cannot entirely state them words. If a person I worry about the most is Mama because she will need more than just prayers to seek consolation. Please explain all this to her. She cannot understand the difficult position I have got myself in to because she cannot read and understand my letter in English. Please look after her when I am gone. I am a very brave man and this you will know in the hereafter. I have taken a stand that none of my predecessors were able to and it is because of this courage that God has examined me. Remember when we were in Swimming pool of Okara and Ali was crying standing on top of the diving board and I had to move him aside and take the jump. I did that because I was brave and had to show him how it is done. But somewhere later in life I lost contact with that brave boy but now my life is threatened and freedom jeopardized, so I am alive again. All my family members will have a long and prosperous life inshallah. Anyhow these tales of heroism have continued in eternity. I am just another man who is about to reclaim his sword. Mind you this has nothing to do with Mein Kampf. Anything I say or do has no effect upon these spirits. They want to see me exactly how they want to see me and not what I really am. Just think of my absence of few years as a prolonged vacation, separation for few years. Please get Ali and Bilal married early because this will help them to stay on the righteous path as well as achieve their long term goals. I also advise everyone to not read books of Rumi e.t.c because these spirits come here from the next world when you read them. And do not let anyone read or write poetry because this also has bad consequences. I have signed a cheque of 38000. Please give this money to charity on my behalf. There are also office documents lying aside the cheque on my bed. Please have them returned along with the car. Once more please listen carefully Agha I have taken the right path and you must trust me on this. I know I have caused you mental discomfort but I do not have a choice. Just remember me living happily in the hereafter. I will see you folks in the next life. I love you all very much. Please do not cry or feel remorse over my death because I will be very much alive in fact more than people are in this world.
GOD IS THE GREATEST, Allah o Akbar!
Your most loving Son